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Bezos the Easter Bunny

State of the Union: Let’s ban Amazon deliveries on Easter Sunday.
Amazon Prime delivery person in van sorting packages, Queens, New York
(Photo by: Lindsey Nicholson/UCG/Universal Images Group via Getty Images)

Easter Sunday was a glorious day in Herndon, Virginia. The sun was out, flowers in bloom, family together, and the living God is risen indeed. Not much could put a damper on the Feast of Feasts. But the incessant back-up beep of an Amazon delivery truck sure did try.

Yes, apparently the need to deliver cheap Chinese crap just one day earlier is enough to warrant delivery drivers manning their trucks on Easter morning. The juxtaposition of white collar workers enjoying their Most Holy Day of worship and kinship, while the gig economy continues to hum along unimpeded, puts the argument for bringing back blue laws into stark relief. Jeff Bezos may want to maintain Easter deliveries to grab his next billion so he can buy the Redskins Commies. The delivery truck drivers certainly need their meager earnings to buy things far more essential. It is therefore incumbent upon a civilized society to preserve the day from these market forces.

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Really, what is the argument against banning certain kinds of commercial activity on Easter Sunday? Lack of religiosity? I’m sure even the most secular would enjoy a one day respite from the economic machinations of neoliberalism. Free markets? One who feels compelled to clock into the delivery truck on Easter Sunday is hardly free.

You don’t need yet another cheap widget delivered on Easter Sunday morning. You need time to rest, reflect, and realize that Christ is truly risen. Bring back the blue laws.