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That’s Provincial!

'Memba John Davidson? He simply can no longer be silent about this crazypants Christianity thing
Noted early '80s TV philosopher John Davidson still has great hair and teeth (John Davidson At The Follies/Flickr)
Noted philosopher John Davidson still has great hair and teeth (John Davidson At The Follies/Flickr)

John Davidson, erstwhile host of TV’s That’s Incredible!, has declared rhetorical war on Christianity and the stupid people who believe in it. Excerpt:

I simply can no longer remain silent when our leaders are so credulous as to believe that a virgin can give birth, that a man can walk on water, that a man can be dead for three days and then come back to life, that a man really did put two of every species on Earth into a boat, floated around for 40 days feeding them their individual diets, and then landed somewhere with any of them still alive. I don’t want those who believe that mankind began with Adam and Eve, who met a talking snake in the Garden Of Eden, teaching my grandchildren anything!

It is clear to me that the world would be more sane if all religions, all primitive superstitions, were abandoned. We are not capable of knowing all the mysteries of life. But science and the empirical method of discovery are the “candle in the dark.” Blind faith cannot be allowed to win out over rational thought.

Well, golly. The man who brought us the Yogi Coudoux folding himself up into a box on TV simply can no longer hold his peace. He’s taking a stand that’s bound to cost him a great deal in the entertainment industry, which is known for its severe piety. That’s … something.

Davidson’s essay is unbelievably trite. For example:

On a lighter note, when a football player points a finger to the sky after a touchdown, but fails to point another finger to the sky after a fumble, it’s laughable. Why is the believer’s credo to give divine thanks when things go right but not to lay blame when the opposite occurs? It makes no sense, and I guess that’s the point.

Hey, has Davidson not recruited his TI! co-host Fran Tarkenton to the cause?

Truly, Christianity will not long survive this kind of assault. When the Kraken that is the army of forgotten TV celebrities of the 1970s and 1980s is awakened, there’s no hope for the Bible-thumpers and God-botherers.

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