You Might Be An Elitist If . . .
Much has been written about “elitism” during this election season, mostly because Barack Obama is supposedly a snooty elitist while Sarah Palin is a moose killin’ tribune of the working stiffs. Although critics of elitism rarely define the term or give specific examples, I get the impression that elitists are some bad people. As a public service, I have drawn up the following non-exhaustive list of traits that might help you to steer clear of these people or determine if you are one:
You might be an elitist (or at least a member of an elite) if . . .
- You have worked for or have written for, any journal of opinion or think magazine. National Review doesn’t count since there is nothing elite about a magazine that publishes Victor Davis Hanson and Jay Nordlinger.
- You know the work of, or are vaguely familiar with the one or more of the following: Tony Scott, Louis Menand, David Brooks, or Wendell Berry.
- You know what arugula is.
- You prefer The Wire to The Sopranos.
- You prefer The Sopranos to The Wire.
- You have a theory about the final scene of The Sopranos.
- You prefer the films of Scarlett Johansson to those of Jessica Simpson.
- Your review has been “blurbed” on book or DVD case.
- You Know what “Mozart, James Joyce and Sodomy” refers to.
- You have numerous books with some variation of “collection of essays” in the subtitle.
- You own numerous books from university presses. Not just Harvard, Yale, NYU and Oxford–state schools that are good in sports, such as LSU and the University of North Carolina have prestigious presses. Also, the more titles you own that were published by Farrar, Straus & Giroux or Alfred A. Knopf or Henry Holt or the Grove Press or W.W. Norton; the more likely you are to be an elitist.
- You possess one or more DVDs from the Criterion Collection.
Looking at this list, I’ve discovered that many of them apply to me. I would prescibe 6 CCs of Pabst Blue Ribbon and some Hank Jr. to bring me back to sanity, but alas PBR has become the brew of choice among urban hipsters. What’s an elitist to do?
