Tom Brady, who announced his intention to retire (again) today, has been in the NFL since I was five years old. I have a master’s degree, two children and one on the way, three unpublished novels, and a mortgage.  

Brady’s longevity as the premier quarterback is a testament to his particular talent and discipline; it is worth pointing out, however, that this is the era of the eternal quarterback. QBs regularly last fifteen seasons, often competitive to the end.

What makes this endemic longevity so striking is that it coincides with an overall decline in American life expectancy. It underlines the biological discrepancy between our elite classes and our poor, who, on average, can expect to die 15 years younger than their wealthy counterparts. 

Brady’s eccentric but apparently effective physical regimen peels back the particulars of that gap. Pampering poor Brother Ass is a luxury for the wealthy. The rest get on as they can.