Phil Robertson, the don of all things Duck, has stepped in it now:

In statements that threaten the A&E reality hit’s wildly popular and uplifting brand of faith, family and hunting, the Robertson patriarch said: “Everything is blurred on what’s right and what’s wrong… Sin becomes fine. Start with homosexual behavior and just morph out from there. Bestiality, sleeping around with this woman and that woman and that woman and those men.” Robertson then paraphrased Corinthians from the Bible: “Don’t be deceived. Neither the adulterers, the idolaters, the male prostitutes, the homosexual offenders, the greedy, the drunkards, the slanderers, the swindlers—they won’t inherit the kingdom of God. Don’t deceive yourself. It’s not right.”

And if that wasn’t explicit enough, the “Duck Commander” added: “It seems like, to me, a vagina—as a man—would be more desirable than a man’s anus. That’s just me. I’m just thinking: There’s more there! She’s got more to offer. I mean, come on, dudes! You know what I’m saying? But hey, sin: It’s not logical, my man. It’s just not logical.”

The magazine suggested Robertson’s son Jep endorsed his family’s beliefs: “We’re not quite as outspoken as my dad, but I’m definitely in line. If somebody asks, I tell ’em what the Bible says.”

Imagine that: openly pious Evangelical Christian duck hunters from northeastern Louisiana holding to normative Christian views about sexuality, and express that somewhat crudely. History’s Greatest Monsters!

Seriously, it’s probably over for the Duck Dynasty now. The Robertsons have touched the third rail of American media culture. The only way A&E holds on to them is because they’re cash cows. But it’s going to be hard for the family. I hope they’re ready for what’s coming. Wonder if you can get a serving duck down at the Chick-fil-A?