A Catholic reader sends the following imagined dialogue on the verge of the Rome summit, where the first scheduled talk will be from Cardinal Luis Tagle of Manila, who will be urging gathered bishops to “smell the sheep” — a Francis phrase instructing bishops to get to know their flocks:

Shepherd: It’s hard to get the sheep to pasture these days. We all agree that wolves are very dangerous. Some of my flock not only lack fear, but the culture teaches them to ENGAGE with wolves. So many get eaten.

Head Shepherd: Wow. Too bad. But… how do they smell?

S: Uh… like sheep. They always smell. Sheep have not changed. I’m just saying many don’t want to get to pasture. They prefer just running around. We need to reinforce what we all know about the wolves, even though for some of the sheep the teachings are hard.

HS: Stop with this rigidity! If some sheep decide that pasture is bad and wolves are good, we must walk WITH them.

S: But they will be eaten. And you know, I am a little concerned. We’ve all heard credible reports that some of the other shepherds in town are actually wolves themselves, in disguise, and are eating young kids right in the pen. Others eat adolescent sheep. It’s terrible.

HS: If some shepherds develop a taste for eating their own flock, who am I to judge?

S: ?!

HS: Just keep smelling your sheep, please.

S: Uh… ok? In the meantime, I’m glad to hear you scheduled this conference about these terrible shepherds who won’t stop eating the flock in the pen. It will be a good chance to clarify that wolves are dangerous and should not be tolerated in the shephrds union. What’s the first workshop about? That seems key.

HS: Like I said, it’s about how your sheep smell. We can’t just keep telling them wolves are bad, or expect to live in a utopia where no wolves ever become shepherds. So let’s focus on knowing their smell and making sure we welcome them, and not be too harsh on them if they wander off. I mean, sheep culture values wandering. If we come down too hard on the wanderers, that seems a little rigid. So let’s focus less on wandering, and more on the smell thing. And maybe encourage the sheep to close their coal fired power plants because THAT is really what the sheep should care about. Not this thing where you refuse to smell them all the time.

S: But the sheep are being EATEN…

HS: Rigidity!

S: Sigh.