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Homeschool Mom Universal Translator

Parlez-vous homeschooling mom? The Homeschool Mom Universal Translator has been around for a while, but my homeschooling wife saw it for the first time last night, and laughed hysterically. I fail to see anything funny here — the joke must be one of those woman things — but submit it for your perusal. Excerpt: When […]

Parlez-vous homeschooling mom? The Homeschool Mom Universal Translator has been around for a while, but my homeschooling wife saw it for the first time last night, and laughed hysterically. I fail to see anything funny here — the joke must be one of those woman things — but submit it for your perusal. Excerpt:

When Your Wife Says… What She Means is… What She Doesn’t Mean is…
I feel like a total failure. I feel like a total failure…hold me… …hold me…Tonight’s the night.
Homeschooling is hard. Could you please hold down the fort while I take a bath. Public school is the only option.
Thanks for helping with the dishes. Keep it up and tonight might be the night. I am in awe of your selfless love as revealed by this profound demonstration
of your servant’s heart.
I quit. Tag!  You’re it! Could you please suggest an  alternative career I could pursue outside the home.
I can’t take it anymore… Double shot, Grande Caramel Macchiato, not too hot, extra foam. Honey, could you please carefully explain how I’m not being rational right now? A PowerPoint presentation would be most appreciated.

Read the whole thing. In truth, there is, um, a lot to this. I read it and was thinking, “Really? That’s what you meant when you said that? Because I thought the other thing.” So until women learn how to say what they mean, I recommend this handy chart. You’re welcome. It’s just one of those special things we guys with servant hearts do for you ladies.

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