A reader writes:

My wife is a teacher, a very highly regarded teacher with many accolades to her credit. When she first started teaching, she chose the lowest socioeconomic middle school in our district, because according to her, they needed her more. Well, she was right, they needed her, but much to her disappointment one teacher, one program, or even one school full of programs and motivated teachers isn’t enough the vast majority of the time. Sure she’s helped some, she has correspondence recounting success, and inspiration from kids she did reach, and who did go on to achieve above their previous condition, unfortunately she sees evidence of all those who could not be reached in the news.

I will never forget the first year she taught at that school, about a third of he way through the year she came home one night (most good public school teachers get home pretty late in the evening), and I could tell she was pretty upset. When I questioned her, she told me that a student had asked her “why do I need to know all this?” She asked which “all this” in particular he was referencing so she could better answer his question, to which he replied: “any of it that y’all teach in this school”. With a great deal of confidence my wife explained how education could open the door to so many positive things in life, how it could put him on the path to fulfillment, and accomplishment, or at the very least a job that could improve his station in life. He promptly replied that neither of his parents had a job, and they were fine… My beautiful, idealistic wife, who wanted so badly to make a difference, looked at me with tears rolling down her cheeks, and asked me how she was supposed to combat that. I had no answer…still don’t.

My wife battled uncooperative parents (even had one refer to their own child as a n-word), parents who didn’t care, parents who were unable to control or influence their own children, and parents who looked to shift responsibility to anyone else as long as it wasn’t them. She struggled with an administration who only cared about getting students through standardized tests, and catering education to the lowest common denominator. She was forced to dedicate a disproportionate amount of her time to disruptive, uncooperative students, leaving those with a real interest in learning and a drive to succeed under served.

My wife’s programs and accomplishments had led to her receiving job offers every year from a variety of schools, but for many years she steadfastly resisted, insisting that she was needed where she was. Finally a student threatened to visit physical harm on my wife, and I’d had enough. Until I got pretty loud and adamant about it, the district hadn’t even planned on doing anything about it, didn’t even intend to remove this student from her class! The parent made excuses and directed blame in every direction imaginable. Very little was done.

This incident was a turning point for my wife, she accepted a position at a prestigious private prep school, and although she’s still conflicted about leaving the students who she still feels need her more, she ultimately had to accept that the culture that many of the kids who need a hand up live in, prevents them not only from taking that hand, but often from even recognizing its been offered. Again, I have no clue what the solution is…

UPDATE: If you don’t read the post about the dysfunction among rich white people schools, you’ll miss this comment by Mister Pickwick. You shouldn’t miss it, so here:

This post highlights the problem that drove my daughter out of teaching. She taught first in a low income, majority Latino school. Then she taught in an affluent white school. It was the parents of the affluent white kids that drove her out of the profession.

She was willing to work hard to help low income kids, kids with disabilities and such. But the affluent white parents (mostly professionals) made her life miserable. When my daughter would discipline the bratty affluent white kids (whose behavior was WAY off the charts in terms of disrespect, violence, sexualization and such), the parents would storm into her classroom the next day with a lawyer. And when my daughter would tell one of these affluent white parents that their kid was NOT qualified to be in a Talented and Gifted program, the parents would verbally abuse her and threaten her (one lawyer dad had to be escorted from the school by the cops and banned from school property).

When she was in the low income, majority Latino school, she had to deal with extremely serious issues concerning the kids (fetal alcohol syndrome, hunger, domestic violence, neglect, etc.) But the parents (often illegal immigrants, usually not able to speak English, sometimes illiterate even in Spanish) were better to work with than the affluent white parents, because the Latino parents showed my daughter some respect. The affluent white, professional class parents showed my daughter no respect at all. They were determined that their kids were going to get into Ivy League schools, and no one was going to stand in the way.

Incidentally, my daughter taught second grade. She couldn’t believe the level of violence, foul language, sexualization and disrespect those affluent white second graders displayed. Second graders!