Amy Herckerling’s failed gangster-film parody Johnny Dangerously produced at least one good joke: Our hero Johnny (Michael Keaton) gives his beloved mother (Maureen Stapleton) a cigarette lighter for Christmas. Delighted, she says “I’ve been thinking of taking up smoking; this clinches it.” This came to mind when I saw this: Screening Predicts Which Smokers Will Get Cancer (Via Edward Michael George):

The screen uses cells swabbed from a smoker’s windpipe in an outpatient “bronchoscopy” procedure that can be completed in 10 minutes.
For most people who have or are likely to develop lung cancer, the cells reveal a telltale genetic mechanism — known as the Pl3K pathway—that does not exist in smokers who will not get the lethal ailment. The genetic pathway, set in motion by something in the toxic tobacco miasma, can be detected at cancer’s earliest stage, or even before it exists.

Puritanical anti-tobacconists will palpitate before the prophylactic potential, presumably. On a unfortunately related note (death, cancer) RIP Coots Matthews. Speaking of tobacco, Coots looks to be nursing a considerable wad of Red Man (still combining tobacco with a politically incorrect name after nearly a century, God bless and protect them) in this NY Times photo of the Red Adair crew on the set of Hellfifghters (UOL*).
*unworthy of link

update: to be fair to Dangerously, there are a few more zingers in there. The ruthless and foul-mouthed Greek gangster solemnly commencing his testimony to Congress (a la The Godfather) with “You varging bastiches. You have violated my varging civil rights” is timeless.