Here is a man who doesn’t realize that he has career opportunities in one of our more progressive Christian denominations:

Each night, he tucks one under his shirt and sleeps with the chosen balloon. “They create a world of sleeping on clouds and I want to feel the love emanating from these beautiful, beautiful balloons,” he says in the episode.

“It feels so warm and your heart just reaches out to [them],” he says. “I believe these are my children. They are a part of who I am … and make a part of my so-called family.”

Loving balloons seems harmless enough, but Dr. Rebecca Beaton, director and founder of the Stress Management Institute, said attachment to objects can be considered a mental illness if it interferes with daily life or causes great stress.

“I presume he has some difficulty with relationships with other people if he has a balloon under his shirt,” said Beaton, who has never treated Dave.

My “so-called” family? C’mon, Dave, don’t internalize your oppression!