The whole damn nation needs to take a collective Xanax. In suburban Houston, a mom saw a Suspicious Character outside her kid’s school. The school went into lockdown, and the police, who were busy pulling a body out of a lake, arrived later than the Helicopter Mommies wanted them to. Here’s what happened next:

“The safety of the children is a major priority compared to having a vehicle stolen or a house broken into,” said mother Krystal Turbeville.

Luckily, it turned out to be a false alarm. The man was from the new cleaning crew and didn’t have an appointment.

Atchison questioned the deputy.

“I said I’ve been on the phone with you for 13 minutes and you’re just now getting here? He said ‘we’ve been kind of busy pulling a body out of a lake.’ I left. I couldn’t handle it anymore.” Atchison said.

No one likes to talk about the “what if,” but Atchison believes she got a glimpse and it scares her even more.

A new janitor. That was the lockdown threat. I love the fact that nothing happened, but that frightens Mommy even more.

Clearly, this school needs to have its own drone hovering overhead, at all times. Somebody, please, think of the children!