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Politics Foreign Affairs Culture Fellows Program

Hobosexual Studies

An exciting new way to waste tuition money and your mind in the decadent humanities
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So, there’s this:

Via @ryantand
Via @ryantand

Queer bum sex. Well, golly. Tramps like us, baby we were born to … oh, I’m not going to say it. This joint has some standards, you know.

That’s even crazier than Prof. Heather Tapley’s class “Queering The Undead,” in which she inquires into the phenomenon of gay zombies (she talks about it here.) In the recent past, she has also published a paper about the search for the invisible female hobo in “deconstructing discourses of hobo masculinity.”

It’s time to close down the universities humanities departments. They’ve gone into terminal decline. Bring out your dead, bring out your dead…

But wait, there’s more! Heather Tapley is a patron of the arts too. In this clip (NSFW), the professor introduces some of her “Feministeppin” students, performing an agitprop cheerleader routine as their final project in their women’s studies class. I might be going out on a limb here, but I think it’s safe to say, after watching this video, that Ms. Tapley is a man-hater.

And apparently a clown masquerading as an assistant professor. From the Rate-My-Professor site, these characteristic reviews:

Tapley is a great lecturer. Sadly she has become lazy. Class is based on four, ten question multi choice quizzes. They have no connection to learning the material but instead are based on puzzles like trying to see where she dropped a number or inserted an extra letter.

And:

She’s so funny! You’ll never have to write a paper in her class, but your grade will be dependent on 3-5 multiple choice quizzes with 10 questions each. Make sure you do all the readings carefully and attend all lectures. She’s super passionate and swears a lot so be prepared! I take all her classes if I can!

Here’s a link to several more videos this group of wack-job feminist cheerleaders put out. NSFW, mostly. Here are the lyrics to one of the chants:

We are taking back subjectivity
Ugh! You like my t**s you like my a**?
Good for you, but you have to ask!
You wanna get on your knees and give me a kiss?
F**k you! You can’t touch this!
It’s up to us to take the steps
So shut your mouth and watch us dance!
We’re taking back subjectivity

Here’s another:

We are…
FAR OUT! (clap, clap)
FAR OUT! (clap, clap)
We sing and scream and shout! (clap, clap)
We laugh! (clap, clap)
We cry! (clap, clap)
We poke out rapists eyes!
Ladies, LET’S GO!
We are tough, we don’t want your violence
We have had enough!
We’re taking back the night,
and you know it feels so right!
Sisters let’s unite!
We’re taking back the night!
PATRIARCHY!
Can go fly a kite! (clap, clap)
Can go fly a kite! (clap, clap)
MISOGYNY!
My butt you can bite! (clap, clap)
My butt you can bite! (clap, clap)
We’re taking back the night,
and you know it feels so right!
Sisters let’s unite!
We’re taking back the night!
We want to BE SAFE!
We want to BE FREE!
And if you don’t love it- SHOVE IT!

And here is a link to the Gender Studies department in which Prof. Tapley teaches. Say, Gender Studies department, what will you teach me? This:

In GNDR classrooms, you’ll acquire a unique perspective on the world and your place in it, on how power works, and on how systems of inequality can be resisted and challenged. The knowledge you gain will be relevant and applicable to your live, and you’ll develop essential academic, professional, leadership and activist skills.

Key areas of focus include:

  • Indigenous women and the politics of resurgence

  • human rights and development

  • health and medicalization

  • anti-racism and nationalism

  • globalization and resistance

  • girlhood studies

  • cultural production

  • masculinities

  • queer and trans theory

  • post-structuralism

 

So, basically they teach you how to be a perpetually enraged activist or an academic (a distinction that apparently is without much difference in this field). Enjoy paying back your student loans on a barista’s salary, ladies. A mind is a terrible thing to waste.

Meanwhile, enjoy this promotional video for Tapley’s department. You can see her at the 1:00 point, and the 2:50 point:

[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vATs-P4VU-Y?rel=0]

UPDATE: There are some readers, apparently, who believe that I really do advocate closing down the university humanities departments. Honestly, people. Honestly.

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