Yesterday I went to see Theodoric of York, Medieval Barber my local sports medicine shaman about my knees. It seems that I was way too overeager in my delight at having the energy to get back to the gym, and really damaged them on the ellipticals by having the wrong footing. They hurt so bad I could only get up and down by throwing my body forward, grimacing and shuddering. The only way I got through Walker Percy Weekend was by eating Advils like M&Ms.

The problem, the doctor said, is that I most likely have developed some degree of arthritis in my knees. Plus, the autoimmune disorder I have has probably exacerbated susceptibility to inflammation. What you see above is him deploying some sort of torture device that he pressed hard against both knees, on all sides, and scraped. Metal against bone, dragging hard to break up the scar tissue. Man, did it hurt! But you know, here I am tonight able to get up and down without pain. He also sent me away with some exercises to strengthen my knees before I go back to the gym, and advice for nutritional supplements to fight inflammation.

It’s hell getting old. I advise against it.