The Right Before Christmas
The ingenious Scott Lahti posted this little ditty in the comments section of a post a while back. I figure it deserves a bit more attention — enjoy!
THE RIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS
Now, Ingraham! Now, Philgramm! Now, Graham, K-Lo and Zell!
On, Marksteyn! On Malkin! On Levin and Bozell!
To the Dem bums we’ll scorch! To the RINOs we’ll maul!
Now Rush away! Rush away! Rush away all!
With each but a nerd, they went straight to Judge Bork,
And hung up their bloggings, then barreled for pork,
And slipping their fingers inside of their ears,
And aping J-Pod, read “The Corner” for years;
They sang to DeLay, to his toe they were mistle,
While the Dems clover-leaf’d, as the shamrock o’er thistle.
But I heard them exclaim, ere they Roved out of sight,
“Barry Christmas to O., from what once was the Right.”
Very cute!
Thank you, Fran – to quote Butch Cassidy, it’s what sustained me in my hour of need.
My final Home Version finds me modifying the penultimate line to:
“But I’d hear them exclaim, ere they’d Rove out of sight,”
I’m also available for children’s cigar socials, Dittohead birthday parties, AEI bar mitzvahs, Log Cabin Republican weddings [check local listings, aka state law, before calling my agent], interfaith neocon caroling fests [at which I dress as King Kristol, and keep NYT yule logs burning in a fireplace not far from the Punch bowl], and have recently branched out into performing gangsta Rāga at book-launch parties for, e.g., Dinesh D’Souza, Ramesh Ponnuru, Reihan Salam, and Fareed Zakaria, under the stage-name CPAC Shakoor…